Dying to Say This to You
by ILoveMyGeeWay
Summary: ...I grabbed Gerard’s wrists lightly. He had said it, the words I was dieing to hear. The reason I wake up each morning was sitting on top of me making my dreams come true...


**Dying to Say This to You**

I sighed. Across the club I could see Gerard surrounded by women, 'Angel' by Shaggy played from the speakers overhead. I bounced my foot with the beat. Bodies swayed around me as I sat against the wall by myself and drowned my sorrows in alcohol.

I saw Gerard whispering into some blonde girl's ear with his seductive smirk set in place. She was falling into his trap. He is defiantly getting some tonight.

I got up and walked out of the small club to the streets of Belleville. I stuffed my hands in my pants pockets, keeping my head down as I walked the back way home. Lucky for me I didn't run into anybody. Tonight was one of the better nights where I didn't get beat up or ridiculed and called a "fag".

Words like "Fag" and "Homo" really don't bother me anymore, When you hear it everyday the effect seems to fade to dust. No one but my parents and Gerard know that I really am gay. When I told my parents they kicked me out of the house, my dad threatening to kill me if I ever came back. So are the woes of a closet fairy. I want to tell people but I'm unpopular, as is, people already wish I was dead, if I came out I have no doubt they will kill me.

I want to move to New York City or San Francisco. There I will get acceptance. They both have a large gay community.

I flopped down on my bed in the empty apartment I shared with Gerard. Tonight Gerard wasn't coming home. We agreed that if we ever hook up we wouldn't bring them home with us but go to their place. With a sigh I climbed off my bed and scrambled to the doorframe, and swayed down the hall to the kitchen, for I still was pretty buzzed. I pulled a mountain dew out of the refrigerator and chugged it. I stood against the counter listening to the fresh rain pound against the roof and windows. It had started to pour since I got here.

I heard the front door open and close along with a husky laugh. With out a thought I walked to the doorframe, stopping to examine Gerard. His long black hair stuck wildly against his pale face. He shook his head, flinging water all over me, while laughing like a maniac.

I felt my mouth turn up at the corners. With out a sound I went to Gerard, helping him out of his jacket. My hands were shaking like crazy as I hung up his coat. When I turned back around Gerard noticed. He grabbed my hands and kissed them. I turned my head away blushing.

Gee chuckled once again. "Put some dry clothes on," I muttered. Gerard immediately left. I sunk down on the couch. My hands still tingling where Gerard had kissed them. It was as though a fire had started under my skin at the epicenter of his kisses and is now spreading throughout my body and making me jittery. This tingling was the beginning of a rapture in my body, my heart called for more.

Gerard returned in only a pair of drawstring, cotton sweatpants. He had a tiny gut but I thought it cute. Otherwise his flawless, flat chest that called to me was worthy of magazines. It was anything anybody would have wanted.

Gerard sat next to me on the loveseat. He sat down crooked so he leaned on me and brought his feet up on the couch. My heart skipped at the thought, there was a whole other couch but Gerard sat next to me, the love seat was large enough but he leans on me. His long dark hair was wet and the ends of it tickled my neck.

I spoke first, "What happened to the blonde?" I turned my head slightly towards Gerard, showing him that I was listening while staring off at the wall.

"She, uh, didn't grab my fancy." Gerard used that same distant tone that reflected in my voice, His response hit me as odd, it brought me out of my sullen shell a little further.

This time I did turn to look at him as best as I could as I spoke, "No one seems to be striking your fancy lately, What's up with that?"

"Honestly?" Gerard questioned. I just nodded in response. "There's someone who I just can't get out of my mind. Honestly, I think I love them. No," Gerard shook his head, "I know that I love them." My heart sunk and a dry lump formed in my throat. I tried to swallow painfully and my eyes burned, stinging with tears I refused to let fall.

I used all my will to keep my voice from quavering. "How come you don't get with them then? And just ditch the club scene." I kept picturing Gerard in bed with her, giving her his all, whispering to her his devotion and truly meaning it.

I felt Gerard shift next to me. My hands were shaking and I wanted to collapse in a heap and cry. "I'm not sure how he feels about me," Gerard whispered, his voice, too, was shaking. I felt Gerard's breath faint on my cheek; I smelt the hint of alcohol laced in it.

"He?" I felt Gerard nod and felt his finger tips working their way onto my leg, pulling on my pants in a desperate fashion, needing something, I just couldn't come up with what. "Then why aren't you with him now? Find out how he feels, that's what I would try to do." I shut my eyes, scrunching up my eyebrows in pain and agitation as the women's form in the bed next to Gerard turned to a muscular, blonde male.

I opened my eyes when I heard the rustling of clothing and felt Gerard's breath hot on my neck as he moved closer. As my heavy lids rose I saw Gerard straddle me slowly and unsurely. "Frank," Gerard's breath was dancing on my neck, coming fast and uneven, he grabbed me, clutching the fabric of my shirt at the shoulders. "What makes you think I'm not with him now?" I felt Gerard relax a little and sit on my knees. I still felt the need rolling off him. I sat in shock, feeling Gerard slump against me for support. "Tell me Frank, tell me you want me too, please. Just mean it. Need me like I need you, love me like I love you." Gerard's tears fell upon my shirt and neck. A stray tear let loose and rolled down my cheek.

I grabbed Gerard's wrists lightly. He had said it, the words I was dieing to hear. The reason I wake up each morning was sitting on top of me making my dreams come true but there was the undeniable stench of liquor coming off him. "You've been drinking."

"I don't care Frank, I don't care. That means nothing, I just wanted to forget the pain, I'm dying without you. Don't you see that? I love you! I love you," Gerard broke down in tears, forehead housed in the crook of my neck and fingers twisting my shirt. My tears fell as I wrapped my arms around the waist of the boy who melted my heart, my angel. It's cliche and severely cheesy but that's what Gerard is, he is my angel.

"Hush, babe. Shush. It's okay, I love you too."

Gerard stiffened, lifting his head, revealing red eyes still leaking tears. "You mean it?" He croaked out.

I nodded, bringing my hand to his cheek. I pulled him close, my hand guiding his face to mine for a chaste kiss. "Of course I mean it." I spoke softly as though talking any louder would shatter this moment. "I've never meant anything as much as I do this. I've never felt a love like this. I hope you mean it when you tell me you love me. You beautiful boy, please don't break my heart."

I wont," Gerard leaned in and kissed me again, he rested his forehead against mine, "I promise I wont. I promise. I love you too much. Just never leave me."

I kissed my love repeatedly, our lips meshing together as one. Gerard licked my bottom lip and I granted him access. My hand slid to Gerard's neck and my fingers massaged the back of his neck while our tongues fought for dominance.

Gerard grabbed the back of my head and deepened the kiss. It became more heated and hands began to roam and grope. Gerard pulled away panting, "Frank, I need you." We changed positions, turning Gerard slid off me to lie on the couch and I moved over top of him.

I laid over Gerard, locking my lips with him while my hands pulled on his head, his wet hair slipping between my fingers as I pulled him closer, and massaged the back of his neck.

I felt Gerard stabbing into my thigh and winced slightly. I shifted positions so I was rubbing against Gerard's crouch. I pulled away from Gerard's mouth and moaned into his shoulder as his breathing grew more erratic and he clutched onto me. Out clothed erections rubber together sending shivers down my spine and moans to my lips in a sickeningly sweet manner.

I felt my whole body warm up. Looking at Gerard my breath caught and I grew even harder. His hair stuck to his face wildly and curled around his ear. His pale face was splashed with a tinge of pink, his mouth hung open as he gasped for breath, his beautiful, full, pink lips were swollen and ever so inviting while his eyes were half-lidded and you could see the lust burning in his golden orbs.

"Frankie, I need you now. Please" Gerard's orbs searched mine and I found I couldn't deny him. Our movements were clumsy and rushed. I peeled off Gerard's pants as he worked on pushing my shirt up. Both of us were topless and Gerard was starting to fumble with the buttons of my pants while I placed steaming kisses around the base of his neck and nipped at his collarbone.

As Gerard got my pants undone and pushed them down as far as he could I kicked them off and breathed a sigh of relief as the pressure from the skinny jeans was released.

Gerard sat up and flipped over to stand on his knees and wiggled his boxers off. I couldn't help but strip as fast as I could and push Gerard down and push against him. Seeing his cute little ass wiggle pushed me over the edge of self-control and my whole body yearned to be inside him.

Both of our breathing was labored once again. "Oh shit, lube. I don't have any lube." I wasn't going to do anything that would hurt my Gerard.

"Fuck! Just do it without it!" I didn't reply I just pulled away, "fine, fine. Spit? Fuck. My hair is still wet, just run your fingers through it till they're soaked and use that."

"Um, okay. Where did you come up with that? I've never heard of using water from someone's hair..."

"Just came to mind, now hurry up." As he spoke I ran my fingers through his hair until they were soaked.

I wrapped my arm around Gerard and pulled him up onto his knees while he rested on his elbows, on the arm of the couch. I slowly slid three fingers into Gerard. As I reached the knuckles I began to spread them apart and stretch him out.

Gerard tensed at my movements and gave occasional grunts of discomfort. I pushed into Gerard as far as I could and stroked his walls as best I could until I found what I was looking for.

As soon as I hit Gerard's G spot his breath caught, his back arched, and he let out a yelp followed by a long, breathy moan. After a few moments of stroking Gerard's G spot and soaking in his constant mewing I pulled away and slowly pushed just my tip in.

"Ready?" I grounded out, holding back from just slamming into Gerard. Gerard tensed and I sensed that he was in pain and discomfort. Gerard gave a nod and I inched my way in. When I was sheathed up to the hilt I moaned at the sensation of Gerard's walls clamping around me.

"Ha...ha.. ha mmm babe, oh my god ah! You're so damn _tight_!" I began pumping into Gerard repeatedly after giving him a moment to adjust. I grabbed Gerard's hand and placed it on my hip. Gerard rocked back with each of my thrusts, burying me deeper inside of him.

I was thrusting into Gerard with my all, grunting from the effort and moaning from the sensation. Gerard screamed in pleasure with me with each thrust.

Gerard collapsed forward, his chest landing on the arm of the sofa. I shifted and continued thrusting, leaning over him, my chest flush with his back, my nails dug into his sides.

My left knee slipped and slid forward, resting next to Gerard's side, my knee brushing his ribs. "Oh uhn F-Frank, I'm about, ah!" Gerard let out; he let go and grabbed my side again, repositioning his hand so he was digging his nails into my side. With each thrust Gerard dug into my side more as he neared his climax.

"Mmm, me too Gee. Ugn-uh, come with me babe." Gerard nodded and with a few more thrusts was shuddering and screaming out my name as he came. As his walls clamped around me and he screamed out my name Gerard pushed me over the edge to my climax.

I stiffened and came inside of Gerard with a growl of his name, my heart pounding, and every fiber in my body screaming in bliss. As I came back down I loosened my hold on Gerard and pulled out of him, flopping back into the couch. I pulled Gerard with me so he was sitting between my legs, his back to my chest and my back to the arm of the couch, our legs tangled together deliciously across the cushions.

When both of our heartbeats had resumed their normal pace I pulled Gerard up off the couch with me, never letting my arms leave his waist. Gerard twisted in my arms to face me. He stared into my eyes with his big, innocent, golden orbs and I felt myself melt under his gaze. Slowly Gerard Leaned down and tenderly pushed his lips to mine.

When Gerard leaned away his gorgeous smile was set in place and he ran a hand through his hair. He leaned down and kissed me again and pulled away, glowing even more with happiness. I know I reflected his joy, a smile plastered on my face as my hands slipped from his waist and his slipped from mine and our hands met and fingers intertwined.

We walked back to my room, the closest one, still smiling and throwing each other shy glances. As we lay in bed and got comfortable we simultaneously moved closer and wrapped around each other, not letting a centimeter come between us.

With a content sigh I whispered into the nape of Gerard's neck, "I love you," and tightened my hold on him.

"I know, I love you too." Gerard whispered back. With one last kiss we were lulled to sleep by the pitter patter of rain hitting the roof and windows while I sucked upon Gerard's collar bone.

-FIN-

* * *

Ah Thank goodness!  
Getting some of the sexual tension out of the way because Love Bites is not going to be seeing any sex for a couple more chapters.  
So I hope you enjoyed this.  
Please review

.Love.

p.s. I got the name of this from the album by The Sounds, e.i. I don't own, obviously. Cus I only own my own Dreams, all of what I write is fiction but one day, one day I will play god and get them together and have them fuck at my will :D


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